- +27 [0]72 423 9064
- careercoach@carolmillar.co.za
As a neuro-affirming life coach and NARM developmental trauma therapist, I take a non-pathologising, strengths-based and relational approach. I believe meaningful change becomes possible when people feel genuinely seen, understand their unique wiring and history without shame, and have greater choice in how they live. My work supports people in:
A supportive space for growth
I believe every individual has an inherent capacity for healing and growth. My role is to support that process by offering a safe space, empathy and curiosity. I am committed to walking alongside you as you explore your inner world and work towards a more fulfilling life.
What NARM means to me
NARM supports my daily reconnection with myself, my sense of aliveness and agency . It helps me engage fully with my passions for people, travel, nature and movement through yoga and hiking.
My practice brings together three connected areas of support: NARM trauma therapy, life coaching and a neuro-affirming understanding of neurodiversity.
Developed by Laurence Heller, the NeuroAffective Relational Model addresses developmental, or relational, trauma arising from early environments in which core needs were not reliably met. It identifies five adaptive survival styles linked to these needs: Connection, Attunement, Trust, Autonomy and Love–Sexuality.
Rather than requiring clients to relive the past, NARM works primarily in the present. It explores how earlier survival strategies may continue to shape identity—for example, “I’m too much” or “My needs are a burden”—while attending to bodily sensations as well as thoughts. This process strengthens agency, helping clients recognise recurring patterns and make different choices.
It is a relational, body-informed approach that supports healing from developmental trauma and reconnection with your sense of self.
A practical, forward-looking partnership that helps clients clarify what they want and take purposeful steps towards it. Through thoughtful questions, reflection and accountability, coaching builds on the belief that each client is resourceful and capable of finding their own answers.
Neurodiversity recognises that human brains naturally work in different ways. These differences are part of normal human variation, rather than defects. Sociologist Judy Singer coined the term in the late 1990s.
Neurodivergent people—including those with ADHD or autism—may grow up feeling chronically misunderstood, corrected or described as “too much”. Repeated experiences of this kind can contribute to developmental and relational trauma.
Experiences such as masking, people-pleasing, rejection sensitivity, shutdown and burnout may relate to neurotype, trauma or both. Good practice avoids pathologising difference or dismissing trauma as “just ADHD”.
These three fields share a central belief: the person is not broken. Change grows through curiosity, self-understanding and agency—not through fixing or blame, whether directed at oneself or others.
Ready to begin your journey with NARM? We are here to answer your questions and help you take the first step.